Whirling Haiku and Senryu

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The first line of each haiku or senryu below is taken from “Dreams Are Also Wounds” by the Afrikaans poet Breyten Breytenbach.
 

Secretly and small
my meddlesome intention
troubles me again.
 
~~ ~~ ~~
 
How green were the birds—
or were they flags fluttering
in the Zocalo?
 
~~ ~~ ~~
 
Even a parrot
can be sacred to the one
cast aside by God.
 
~~ ~~ ~~
 
A yellow parrot
elaborated my words—
flames fell from her tongue.
 
~~ ~~ ~~
 
a scar in my flesh—
residue of rituals
carved out long ago
 
~~ ~~ ~~
 
Birds in the gardens—
a visit to six feeders
satisfies the wren.
 
~~ ~~ ~~
 
Are kings rich in trees
or only in squat demons
brooding near their thrones?
 
~~ ~~ ~~
 
Are mere husks of flesh
enough to reach the summit,
or will you need more?
 
~~ ~~ ~~
 
into walking sticks
you may transform lengths of string
by incantations
 
~~ ~~ ~~
 
destined to wither—
the indigenous peoples
that forsake their way
 
~~ ~~ ~~
 
inkdrops from my heart—
they have scant significance
for those who write not
 
~~ ~~ ~~
 
enters the poem
sexy elegant goddess
swiveling her hips

 
© 2012 by Magical Mystical Teacher
 
 
More The Sunday Whirl, Wordle 56

Posted on May 13, 2012, in Breyten Breytenbach, haiku, senryu, The Sunday Whirl. Bookmark the permalink. 12 Comments.

  1. I LOVE this one:

    Are mere husks of flesh
    enough to reach the summit,
    or will you need more?

    I must admit, that I was anticipating your work this morning, excited to see what you did with this list. You did not disappoint. All of these are fantastic threads. The birds are nice this week.

  2. What fun to use someone’s first lines as a kick-off. Creative, as they must determine direction. My favourite is the same as Brenda’s.

  3. That’s a very creative way to approach this prompt. Well done you!

  4. You’ve done it again! Bravo.

  5. I really enjoy your first, they do start out that way, “secret and small.” I really like the introspective feeling and parrot-bird theme throughout these.

    This one:

    “inkdrops from my heart—
    they have scant significance
    for those who write not”

    I can SO relate to this. To get a caring reader out of the real life people of my world is sometimes certainly difficult.

    Great whirl!

  6. I really like “flames fell from her tongue”. Actually I liked the whole thing. I like the bird images.

  7. A tour de force! What a marvellous idea.

  8. They are all wonderful, Magical. But the last is my fav, swiveling hips, indeed 🙂

    Pamela

  9. Like them all and for all different reasons. Great way to deal with these words,

    Elizabeth
    http://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/2012/05/13/reflection/

  10. Once again you leave us stuffed with plenty of wonderful images. And thankfully with the many online writing communities we do not need to rely on those who “write not”. for moral support. – And thank you for causing me to ponder over on my wordle!

  11. My favorites this week: “mere husks of flesh”, “destined to wither”, and “inkdrops from my heart”.

    Richard

  12. “into walking sticks
    you may transform lengths of string
    by incantations”

    I think that’s my favorite part. The image of it is delicious.

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