The Probability

 photo adebbc66-c58e-4611-b077-01c8790dc30c_zpssxezpptm.jpg

 

the probability
 
that she will be sleeping
 
when he comes
 
to bring her coffee
 
bleached white with powder
 
instead of cream
 
is great
 
he sees her lying there
 
in an impossible heap
 
of bones
 
her skin
 
stretched tight over her skull
 
and he wonders
 
if even as she sleeps
 
she can hear the birds singing
 
just outside the window
 
or the sound the bricks make
 
as they shift uneasily
 
in their bed of mortar
 
causing a startled raven
 
to slam against the house

 

Poem © 2016 by Magical Mystical Teacher
 
 
More Poetry Pantry #297
 
More Sunday’s Whirligig #54

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Posted on April 10, 2016, in poetry, Poetry Pantry, Poets United, Sunday's Whirligig and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 22 Comments.

  1. That’s intense… enjoyed it.

  2. The serene setting is dashed with the faux images created by the contrary words that make this into a nightmare.

  3. That was an unexpected ending!

  4. There is something very gothic in an end like that. Just like a real nightmare it jumps from bliss to panic in an instant.

    • magicalmysticalteacher

      Life is like that sometimes, isn’t it?

      On Sun, Apr 10, 2016 at 7:37 AM, Magical Mystical Teacher wrote:

      >

  5. wow…that’s an uncanny twist at the end….

  6. Oh I love the unexpected ending…I too almost like a nightmare we wake from!

  7. Not your usual, but so very fluid, both with imagery and words. Really like that hard tight twist on the end,

    Elizabeth

    https://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/2016/04/10/for-those-of-us-who-dont/

    • magicalmysticalteacher

      It’s time to get out of my “usual,” don’t you think? 😉

      On Sun, Apr 10, 2016 at 10:18 AM, Magical Mystical Teacher wrote:

      >

  8. Whoa! Poor raven. Interesting, their “bed of mortar”.

  9. There is an underlying sense of foreboding in this…..perhaps it’s the raven’s demise that does it, but it weaves in so beautifully with the lovely images interspersed throughout that it leaves the reader a little unsettled in a way that glorious writing does.

  10. A cool and intense write!! Your ending is a nice twist.

  11. Wow, that certainly is different from what we have become used to from you! Heavy, deep, dark and…brilliant!

    Visit Keith’s Ramblings

  12. Gets it off a great twist with the ending. It is an innovative take MMT!

    Hank

  13. Great twist at the end MMT!

    Hank

  14. Rosemary Nissen-Wade

    Wow, just wow!

  15. Wow. Bad day for the ravens.

  16. Great use of your words… even though I thought they were incompatibly challenging 🙂

  17. I love the change of form – seems to echo the small but lasting passage of time and probably you have shared with us – coffee in bed – could be worse 😉

  18. So different, but I like the intensity and words. Good to break out sometimes.

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