Whirling with Donald Hall

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This week’s words: race, silky, lanky, whiskey, puddle, pain, mouth, isolate, murky, breath, marsh, razor, befuddled

 
The first line of each haiku or senryu is taken from Donald Hall’s “Stump.”


 
~~ 1 ~~
 
I am used to it—
the hangovers each morning,
whisky on his breath.
 
~~ 2 ~~
 
white blossoms that last
barely a day in this heat
but weeks in a dream
 
~~ 3 ~~
 
where the warm water
gathers into a puddle—
marsh in the making
 
~~ 4 ~~
 
The shade of old summers
is drawn to isolate me
from inner weather.
 
~~ 5 ~~
 
Every afternoon
murky ways lie before me—
befuddled am I.
 
~~ 6 ~~
 
In the gray winter
pain joins my race to the end—
no one wins this one.
 
~~ 7 ~~
 
scraping the stiff snows
with a dull straight-edge razor
unbearding winter
 
~~ 8 ~~
 
The little garden
silky with cobwebs at dusk—
Jesus comes to pray.
 
~~ 9 ~~
 
By night a bare trunk,
gaunt and lanky as Lincoln,
leans against the stars.

 
© 2013 by Magical Mystical Teacher
 
More Poetry Pantry #176
 
More The Sunday Whirl, Wordle 135

Posted on November 17, 2013, in 5-7-5, Donald Hall, The Poetry Pantry, The Sunday Whirl and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 28 Comments.

  1. Another nice collection! My favorite is #2. The memory of beautiful blossoms, no matter how temporary, lives on long after the blossoms die.

  2. very nice set…exquisite haiku flow……striking visual in the last one….:)

  3. Very nice – I love the last verse: “a bare trunk, gaunt and lanky as Lincoln” – I wish I had written it 🙂 Great collection!

  4. I am constantly befuddled all day long. I could relate to this one:)

  5. The journey through the day can often feel like the journey through life..so tired..and yet amidst sharp edges and whiskey breath there is always something which seems to make it worth scraping through..

  6. Number 1 and 4 made me sad. 1 – not something you’d want to get used to.

  7. nice…the shade of old summers drawn…that is def a favorite in this string….
    intriguing too that you had lincoln and jesus in there…

  8. So witty! My favs 4,5,9. Thanks for sharing!

  9. Loved this – best of my day so far… Lively, ambitious work -which has its own voice – Great! With Best Wishes Scott http://www.scotthastie.com

  10. nice work – I really enjoyed these modern haikus

  11. I like 5 and for some reason 1….it says so much in so few words

  12. luv the ‘bare trunk’ verse; have a nice Sunday

    much love…

  13. Oh “the shade of old summers” and that big old tree “lean(ing) against the stars”. Cool images!

  14. veronicabalfourpaul

    oh I love these! they are so neat and yet they reach deep into the soul. And ‘unbearding winter’. How great is that!!!

  15. Love how you let the words themselves lead you to a unique space and time…time after time. Vivid and somehow haunting, as always,

    Elizabeth
    http://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/2013/11/17/dinosaur-memories/

  16. Number 4 illustrates how important memories are to remain content to cope with future problems. Great collection again.

  17. Wow that was amazing. Love the befuddled one – made me chuckle.

  18. I like #7 best. Unbearding winter is wonderful.

  19. As always a great collection of snapshots from the prompt.

  20. Yup, beautiful collection, mmt. Sorry for the late visit, but you know the life of a teacher is demanding and real life is as well.

    Pamela

    • magicalmysticalteacher

      No worries! I find myself overwhelmed these days, and don’t get around to nearly as many blogs as I’d like to. Be well!

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