Whirling with Donald Hall

Nov 17

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This week’s words: race, silky, lanky, whiskey, puddle, pain, mouth, isolate, murky, breath, marsh, razor, befuddled

 
The first line of each haiku or senryu is taken from Donald Hall’s “Stump.”


 
~~ 1 ~~
 
I am used to it—
the hangovers each morning,
whisky on his breath.
 
~~ 2 ~~
 
white blossoms that last
barely a day in this heat
but weeks in a dream
 
~~ 3 ~~
 
where the warm water
gathers into a puddle—
marsh in the making
 
~~ 4 ~~
 
The shade of old summers
is drawn to isolate me
from inner weather.
 
~~ 5 ~~
 
Every afternoon
murky ways lie before me—
befuddled am I.
 
~~ 6 ~~
 
In the gray winter
pain joins my race to the end—
no one wins this one.
 
~~ 7 ~~
 
scraping the stiff snows
with a dull straight-edge razor
unbearding winter
 
~~ 8 ~~
 
The little garden
silky with cobwebs at dusk—
Jesus comes to pray.
 
~~ 9 ~~
 
By night a bare trunk,
gaunt and lanky as Lincoln,
leans against the stars.

 
© 2013 by Magical Mystical Teacher
 
More Poetry Pantry #176
 
More The Sunday Whirl, Wordle 135

Posted on November 17, 2013, in 5-7-5, Donald Hall, The Poetry Pantry, The Sunday Whirl and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 28 Comments.

  1. Mary | November 17, 2013 at 5:11 am

    Another nice collection! My favorite is #2. The memory of beautiful blossoms, no matter how temporary, lives on long after the blossoms die.

    Reply
  2. Sumana Roy | November 17, 2013 at 5:31 am

    very nice set…exquisite haiku flow……striking visual in the last one….:)

    Reply
  3. Andra Negroiu | November 17, 2013 at 6:01 am

    Very nice – I love the last verse: “a bare trunk, gaunt and lanky as Lincoln” – I wish I had written it 🙂 Great collection!

    Reply
  4. Rallentanda | November 17, 2013 at 6:03 am

    I am constantly befuddled all day long. I could relate to this one:)

    Reply
  5. jae rose | November 17, 2013 at 6:06 am

    The journey through the day can often feel like the journey through life..so tired..and yet amidst sharp edges and whiskey breath there is always something which seems to make it worth scraping through..

    Reply
  6. laughwithme45 | November 17, 2013 at 7:03 am

    Number 1 and 4 made me sad. 1 – not something you’d want to get used to.

    Reply
  7. brian miller | November 17, 2013 at 7:24 am

    nice…the shade of old summers drawn…that is def a favorite in this string….
    intriguing too that you had lincoln and jesus in there…

    Reply
  8. Irene Golembo (@reikimuse) | November 17, 2013 at 7:49 am

    So witty! My favs 4,5,9. Thanks for sharing!

    Reply
  9. scotthastiepoet | November 17, 2013 at 7:58 am

    Loved this – best of my day so far… Lively, ambitious work -which has its own voice – Great! With Best Wishes Scott http://www.scotthastie.com

    Reply
  10. Brother Ollie | November 17, 2013 at 8:24 am

    nice work – I really enjoyed these modern haikus

    Reply
  11. a spirit of simplicity | November 17, 2013 at 10:14 am

    I like 5 and for some reason 1….it says so much in so few words

    Reply
  12. Gillena Cox | November 17, 2013 at 11:16 am

    luv the ‘bare trunk’ verse; have a nice Sunday

    much love…

    Reply
  13. Sherry Marr | November 17, 2013 at 1:16 pm

    Oh “the shade of old summers” and that big old tree “lean(ing) against the stars”. Cool images!

    Reply
  14. veronicabalfourpaul | November 17, 2013 at 3:31 pm

    oh I love these! they are so neat and yet they reach deep into the soul. And ‘unbearding winter’. How great is that!!!

    Reply
  15. 1sojournal | November 17, 2013 at 7:08 pm

    Love how you let the words themselves lead you to a unique space and time…time after time. Vivid and somehow haunting, as always,

    Elizabeth
    http://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/2013/11/17/dinosaur-memories/

    Reply
  16. Old Egg | November 17, 2013 at 7:38 pm

    Number 4 illustrates how important memories are to remain content to cope with future problems. Great collection again.

    Reply
  17. Suzy | November 17, 2013 at 8:23 pm

    Wow that was amazing. Love the befuddled one – made me chuckle.

    Reply
  18. Cheryl's Voice | November 17, 2013 at 9:25 pm

    I like #7 best. Unbearding winter is wonderful.

    Reply
  19. J Cosmo Newbery | November 18, 2013 at 12:34 am

    As always a great collection of snapshots from the prompt.

    Reply
  21. Pamela | November 23, 2013 at 7:08 pm

    Yup, beautiful collection, mmt. Sorry for the late visit, but you know the life of a teacher is demanding and real life is as well.

    Pamela

    Reply
    • magicalmysticalteacher | November 23, 2013 at 7:29 pm

      No worries! I find myself overwhelmed these days, and don’t get around to nearly as many blogs as I’d like to. Be well!

      Reply

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